you’re fantastic, thank you <3
mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something
my dad has literally called me by his own name.
my parents split after they made me. i am a volcano. they are tectonic plates. follow for more geological humour.
i really hope the two people who just followed me aren’t looking for geological humour or you are going to be earth-shatteringly disappointed
this post is one of my best by a landslide
(white girl voice) wait lemme go to the bathroom
are you saying only females of the white race urinate
i am an asian female and i can back this up, i havent urinated since 1902
How old r u
*whispers* how long have you been 17
I know what you are
Say it.Say it out loud.
WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THIS POST.